After the uncharacteristically warm days, I woke up to a cloudy, wet morning. Still not particularly cold but the undecisiveness of the weather called for a more cautious choice of clothes. I don’t own an umbrella and didn’t feel like wearing a hooded coat since it was still quite warm so I had just the perfect excuse to wear a hat. I’ve got two, one a little quirky but still sensible and another that people call a “festival hat”:
Guess what happened? I went with the latter. (Yes, really. On a non-descript Wednesday.) I wore it all through the 45 minutes of public transport getting to work in the morning, then all the way through the other end of the city to give an English class and finally all the way home.
It was weird. Even in a big city like Budapest, people notice hats – they are not that common in the every day life. I practically forced them to look at me. Me, who likes being invisible, stood in front of them, feeling like I was in the crossfire of stares.
And I survived.
I went, they looked, we passed each other and that was it.
I’m not sure what my irrational fear expects from these situations. People calling out remarks? Staring long? Pointing and laughing?
As I said it’s irrational. Of course none of those things happen. But it’s the picture fear paints.
Thanks to yesterday, I now have a different picture to hold up to It: nothing bloody happens!
Yes, we might stare a bit when we see someone unusual. Then we move on and forget them. That’s all it is.
PS: Thank you for being here with me on this journey. Honestly, it really gives me a lot of energy, courage and motivation to put myself out there.